Processing--- classes--- life

Part of who I am is always wondering, considering, processing.... I think there are days I think to much on things. I love being in the heart of it with people, but what do you do when people don't want you in the heart of it? I love realness is others, but sometimes (I am guilty) its hard for me to communicate with others who are not real with themselves. Sometimes this leaves me lonely, and right now there are many of my friends who have left and I am mourning the loss of them here. So its time for me to put my self out there again, but its so hard. then I think do people even want to get to know me? I fall in this loop hole in the military context that we are not civilians, not military, but we love each of them, and try to serve them the best way we can.

Lately I have been feeling insecure because I have noticed military spouses only want to share with military spouses, how do I fit in this mix? Who do I spend time with other than the youth?

I pulled back this last year as I was way over committed the year before, and its been hard to build back into the community... But then I think, I know why I am here is to serve the military with everything I am and have. Sometimes that means loving when no one loves you back....

ouch that is hard.....

We are having to do 10 semester hours of training online for adoption. This has been helpful in that it makes us think about lots of things like what our children will experience with new food, sounds, a whole host of things.... The first course we are doing is eyes wide open. ITs a 19 chapter class that has homework at the end of each one.

We also are taking, Adopting the older child, Becoming your child's best advocate, Conspicuous Families, Discipline and the Adopted Child, The Journey of Attachment, Lifebooks, Medical Issues of International Adoption, We're home, now what (parents of newly adopted school age children). There is a ton of info in each, we are only thru one course.

I think these classes would be good for parents of kids that have them naturally. that brings me to a question, do parents of natural born kids go thru training?

I will sign off, as I am wandering around with my thoughts.

I am sitting here drinking the ethiopia coffee we got!! YUM YUM!!